Sunday, February 24, 2008

Down-and-dirty Dyck under pressure


From the Campaign Trail:
A firestorm of controversy engulfed Mighty Dyckerson's front-running campaign for the US presidency Sunday over a report insinuating he might have veered off the straight and narrow during his first, failed White House bid four years ago.
Concerns arose in the Dyckerson camp when a certain Miss Lamb began appearing with the candidate at fund-raisers, visiting his offices and accompanying him on a client's jet in 2004. Dyckerson's campaign four years ago is best remembered now for an innovative electioneering strategy pledging free internet porn to seniors.
At a heated press conference this afternoon, media mogul Dyckerson categorically denied inserting his penis in anyone's vagina.Dyckerson also dismissed questions about oral sex and cigars.
When one reporter asked, "If you have a politician, an elected official, and they can't be trusted in their own marriage, how can I trust them with the budget? How can I trust them with national security?" a clearly emotional Dyckerson responded by pointing to his genitals.
Dyckerson's wife and first cousin, Dyckette, was fully supportive of her husbands declaration. "He hasn't gotten it up since 1997", she revealed.
Several other women claimed they have also had sex with Dyckerson but they were too ashamed to speak to the news media. One woman did agree to speak so long as she remained anonymous.
"I'm afraid people will says 'that's the best you can do? You poor thing!' If Karla did have sex with him that's what I would say too!" Dyckerson who claims to possess a 22 inch penis (when folded) has refused to comment further on the current whirl of accusations.

12 comments:

Mighty Dyckerson said...

I wouldn't be caught dead fornicating with that ball of lint, Lambo. She has almost as many fleas as Ms. Babble and her incontinent son Joke.

Furthermore, I assure the American people my penis stands tall and firm in the name of democracy. God bless the U. S. of A.!!!

Helen said...

I can't wait to see Dyck posing in the manner of Lincoln at his great memorial on the cover of Esquire. That yellow and red jumpsuit and monkey shines grin just screams blow me.

**there were way too many prepositional phrases in that comment**

Glad you're back to play, Stan.

rantingdiva said...

I Lick Dyck too.

D-HOR said...

I'm Dycks neighbor from across the "wrong side of the tracks" and I can vouch that his wife was lying. I've seen him "get it up" every night watching "Big Dirty Booty" porn. He doesn't close his drapes.

And I have binoculars.

Sudiegirl said...

I've heard there's a support group for women like this.

ann said...

What girl doesn't like Dyck???

Moggs Tigerpaw said...

What Ann said ;-)

qishaya said...

Original christian shoes are first category in alter. They are so much appealing louboutin shoes so, ample of women can not pause to get their hands on them. cheap christian louboutin However, these shoes are not economical. christian louboutin So adequate of women cannot present these shoes. christian louboutin heels Christian Louboutin Replica is presenting the textbook thing for these people. christian louboutin sandals It is present masses of fashionable shoes in an economical rate. christian pumps You know that unique shoes are posh to buy. christian sandals Nevertheless do not think that exchange a shoe with christian louboutin pumps magnificent create of top trait is hard. Now a time model are presented. louboutin pumps But if you hardship attribute cargo look discount christian louboutin for these replicas in a trustworthy position & set an order for your beloved shoes christian louboutin saleind

istanbul escort bayan said...

istanbul escort bayan partner ilanları partner ara

duckless said...

The original chi flat iron was released as a professional salon straightener. After gaining popularity on the market the cheap chi flat iron was later released for personal consumer use. If you are a professional stylist or someone who loves straightening their chi hair straightener before leaving for work the Chi original ceramic flat iron is one styling tool you cannot live without. Unlike other wholesale chi flat iron before its day the Chi model was developed with moist ceramic heat technology that does not burn or damage the wholesale chi hair straighteners.

sex shop said...

al bide burdan yak bakalim haci
porno
sikiş
escort istanbul
escort ankara
ankara escort

livescore said...

Gorgeous dress and lovely fabric choice! Don't be sad about ผลบอล moving to London, think of all the lovely vintage social events you ผลบอลสด can go to. Also London has great fabric shops!