Well, it’s about that time of the month again when I scrape together a post so here goes ( And this particular post should give pause for thought over the Yuletide season).
This Christmas Eve millions and millions of little children will climb into their beds looking for the glorious appearing of Santa Claus.
But …..
Is Santa Claus just a jolly, harmless, friendly fellow?
Or is there something or someone else hiding behind jolly ol’ St. Nick?
Surely anyone with a modicum of intelligence would realize that Santa is in reality a prejudice pedophile, bent on world domination. He promotes consumerism, communism, and obesity. Not only that, but his treatment of Mrs. Claus is atrocious. Santa is also a blatant racist. He is completely anti-Semitic and prints anti-Semitic literature. He is always talking about how the "nice" little boys and girls will get presents at Christmas. Did you ever wonder why no little Jewish boys and girls ever get a Tonka truck under the menorah from Santa? It's because Santa is affiliated with the KKK!! In fact he's heading it up!
The only solution is to put an end to Santa Claus. He is obviously the one and only reason why humans have become so utterly wicked. His tendency to feed on small children and his plan for world domination, should make Santa Claus Public Enemy Number One this year. So next time you take your child to see Santa Claus, give him a gun and say, "Honey, if Santa tries to cop a feel this year, blow his brains out." Besides, your kid can't be tried as an adult anyway, so what's the harm really if you think about it.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!
18 comments:
And what's the deal with that elf sweatshop he's running? Are the labor unions aware of this??!
Well straight onto the naughty list for you Stan. Glad to know you are still alive out there
Mrs. Claus? That bitch deserves the shitty treatment. Look at what she did to the old fat guy. What kind of crap is she feeding the guy? Is she hoping to kill him soon to get a bunch of insurance money?
Where the fuck have you been man????
What a sweet love letter to the jolly ole elf!
And what about the obesity and the drinking and driving, presumably ignored by the Christmas Police. Merry Christmas.
Hey Stan...
I'll be happy to write Dyckerson's campaign theme song...what rhymes with "weasel"?
Your blog made me laugh. Thanks. I found you through Karlababble. I am impressed with anyone who can, and will, use the word "modicum" in a sentence. (What in the hell is Facebook?)
Jill - "Facebook" is a social website thingie like MySpace.
Tyler - Jeez, dude..that's dark.
You coming back, honey?
And I know for a fact that those elves are ex porno stars, so there is more going on in the North Pole than we realize!
You're still hot.
Have you gone for good? Did they refuse bail?
F*** no, Mutters. I'm still here. Indeed, I am currently working on a new post which is provisionally due for publication sometime in late February....
Stan, Boob competition (Round 2) has started at Smack Dab. You enjoyed the last one, come and show your support for the girls! :)
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